Dear Reader,
Welcome to the first official issue from the new club. We are thrilled to have seen so many new and familiar faces wandering around the club, and we are very pleased to report that two days in, there has only been one breach of the dress code (the breach turned out to not even be a member, but instead a passerby who assumed the ‘Plage Du Barb’ was open to the public and had donned their speedos in anticipation).
Anyway, please allow me to update you on some of the happenings in the club over the last 48 hours. The Private Members have already been overhead in The Club rooms, asking for advice on the best places to visit in Cambridge, Edinburgh, and Paris. If you are a Private member, you are encouraged to use the rooms in the club as often as possible and to assist other members in their quest to source the best French pastries and finest Scottish wool! The Club Secretary was recently overheard expressing her outrage over Barbie’s lack of Oscar nominations and is considering heading to the Film Room later today, should anyone else be interested in sharing in the outrage.
The Club Shop has been restocked with a few of our most beloved Rhubarb stickers for you to purchase and cover your laptops/humidors/empty Trudon candle jars (delete where necessary) with. A particular club favourite has been Verbier Rhubarb, given the season. Iris, who mans the shop (worth reiterating again that she is deaf in one ear after an incident with a champagne cork many moons ago) may have accidentally told a handful of members that jumpers and new caps were arriving soon, which we cannot confirm or deny currently.
Members are also reminded that the membership committee are due to meet at the end of this week to review applications. Fortunately, Storm Isha has grounded several of the committees’ jets and they remain in the country longer than they initially anticipated. If you are looking to apply for Social or Private membership, you are encouraged to do so before the end of the week in case said members of the committee find a way to bribe traffic control and your application is left unread for 3-8 months.
