Rhubarb often tells me how hard being a tastemaker is. There are standards required that not many people/places/beach clubs in the South of France meet. Whilst we have regularly wined and dined in many establishments across London together (except for *** ******, where we are no longer welcome after a particularly hairy encounter with a young Borzoi and crushed velvet sofa), there are still very few that actually make the cut. Therefore, the below list has been highly curated and stamped with The Rhubarb Society seal of approval. I have also transcribed notes from Rhubarb?s Little Pink Book for each establishment for the owners who are no doubt reading this aloud to their dogs.
Mayfair
10 recommendationsThe spiritual home of the Society. One could spend an entire week in W1 and never once feel the need to cross into a lesser postcode.
North Audley Cantine
A stone's throw from Selfridges and a great way to take a load off after lecturing the SAs in Louboutin for smiling too much. We particularly like the brunch menu and their banana toast iced latte. Rhubarb likes the ahi tuna poke without the ahi.
Mercato Mayfair
What once was an old church has now been converted into a large food hall with different vendors serving everything from Malaysian food to Italian Gelato. If you go to the lower ground floor, you will find a cheese and wine bar and, at the very top, a small outdoor rooftop. Amen.
Hideaway
The little sister to Hide, Hideaway is nestled on Mount Street, within touching distance of both Hyde Park, the Connaught Patisserie and Sautters. The Truffle Croque Madame is the perfect antidote to the time spent tutting at the queue of people outside Goyard who don't have an SA on speed dial.
Claridge's Art Space Café
Is there anything more civil than sharing an early morning Gruyère and mushroom galette down a mews in Mayfair with your dog? We think not, and neither does Rhubarb, who has made her position on the matter abundantly clear by refusing to consider any other morning option.
Sabor
If you've ever wondered what life as a member of The Bullingdon Club is like, head to Sabor where you are only ever a few feet away from a pig's head. This Michelin-starred tapas eatery is always fully booked (for good reason), so make sure to call ahead.
Connaught Patisserie
Rumour has it The Connaughty Hound was inspired by Rhubarb's Great Aunt. We have neither confirmed nor denied this, as it has done wonders for the table allocation. The pastries are, as expected, flawless.
Ralph's Coffee
Once you've ordered your Oat and Raisin cookie and Gingerbread Latte, you can choose to take a seat outside and people watch on Bond Street or browse Ralph Lauren for the perfect mohair-suede cardi-poncho for your next trip to Argentina. Rhubarb prefers the people watching.
Maison Assouline
In their own words, Maison Assouline is 'a refuge for those seeking style, culture, and art de vivre', which should be the standard for every establishment. The Swans Bar is the perfect place to spend a few hours with your dog, having drinks and nibbles and judging the hideous carpet. Rhubarb likes it when her water is served straight from the cocktail shaker into a martini glass.
Maza
Tucked into the quieter corners of Mayfair — Maza is a new Greek spot opposite the rather more obnoxious 'Guinea Grill'. Best to order every dish to share (the dips are astounding)
Mount Street Restaurant
Mount Street is, at this point, its own micro-climate of excellent restaurants, and the Mount Street Restaurant has quietly established itself as the finest entry on the road. Classic British cooking executed with real precision, a room full of people who all seem to know each other from something vaguely impressive.
Notting Hill
6 recommendationsLondon's most reliably unhinged neighbourhood — in the very best possible way. Bump into everyone you've ever met, eat extremely well, and pretend to be surprised by both.
The Pelican
If you're happy to bump into everyone you've ever met whilst skiing, on safari, or surfing in Polzeath from 2001–2018 for the sake of bloody good food, then head to The Pelican. Order the lobster pie and the mince on toast. Rhubarb can often be found quaffing the homemade pork scratchings by the fire after a long day of meetings.
Sunday in Brooklyn
Avoid on Sundays because the queue will, in fact, stretch all the way back to Brooklyn. However, once you get a table, the brunch is sublime. The pancakes and the cheddar scramble are the perfect cure after a late night of playing with Josef's bells at the Tiroler Hut.
Casa Cruz
Rhubarb comes here for the bone marrow as she swears it's the secret to her flawless skin. She also likes to spend the summer here on the roof terrace, arguing with fellow Champagne Socialists about the gentrification of Notting Hill over the Cote de Boeuf.
The Good Oak
A natural wine bar for those who genuinely understand natural wine, and also for those who find that words like 'funky', 'alive', and 'barnyard' sound like exactly the kind of thing they'd like to order a second glass of. The Good Oak is warm, low-lit, and serves food that makes you feel quietly virtuous without being remotely pious about it. The wine list leans small-producer and regenerative, which we endorse fully and also find extremely useful at dinner parties. Rhubarb sits beneath the bar stool radiating approval, which for her, constitutes a standing ovation.
Rias
Natural wine and pizza? How frightfully NH. However, it's delicious so we don't mind.
The Permit Room
Before India's major cities embraced the cocktail bar, drinking was done in permit rooms — gloriously unglamorous establishments where the rules were loose and the ambience was, shall we say, atmospheric. The Permit Room, Notting Hill's rather wonderful homage to this tradition, has retained the spirit entirely whilst upgrading every other element considerably. It's from the same group as Dishoom so you know the food is fail safe.
Marylebone
5 recommendationsCivilised, bookshop-adjacent, and somehow tricked everyone into thinking it's a village.
Cocoro
Rhubarb tells me this place reminds her of her stint in Japan when she briefly dated one of the Samsungs (pre-criminal conviction and drug conviction, she insists). We love it for authentic ramen and sushi and to get day drunk on Chu-Hi.
Chiltern Firehouse
Firstly, Vinicius is the only Rhubarb Society-approved member of staff at Chiltern, and he often carries Rhubarb to her favourite courtyard table. If you see him, tell him we say hello and have a cigar or two to bribe him with for future reservations. The food is aggressively overpriced, and dogs aren't allowed in the restaurant — but the courtyard and the bar? We love. Rhubarb still texts André daily about the crab doughnuts.
Shreeji Newsagents & Airmail
The world's chicest newsagent, with everything from cigars to coffees, pastries, and magazines that double as coffee table books. There is a little jar of dog treats by the door, making it a real hotspot for pups. Those in the know will forgo Monocle, a few doors down, for Shreeji. Rhubarb knows.
Daunt Books
Daunt is, ironically, like something from a book. Go upstairs and plonk yourself on the floor in the corner for a bit. Rhubarb likes it when I read Paris and her Cathedrals to her, and has developed opinions on the travel section that I'm not fully qualified to argue with.
Josephine
With locations in both Marylebone and Chelsea, Josephine has astutely positioned herself for every stage of the North-to-South migration that characterises a proper London social life. Whether you find yourself post-pilates in W1 or post-school-run in SW3, there is always a Josephine nearby, ready to furnish you with a carafe of something excellent and a plate of steak tartare so good it nearly makes you reconsider your afternoon commitments. Rhubarb has visited both locations and maintains that the Marylebone branch has slightly better light — though she will deny this if asked by anyone from Chelsea.
Fitzrovia
3 recommendationsEccentric, literary, and just disorganised enough to feel genuinely interesting. A proper neighbourhood for proper lunches.
The Mandrake Hotel
This hotel is opulent and eccentric, featuring everything from phallic drawings to giant stuffed animals. A great pitstop for guacamole and mangosteen cocktails when you need to entertain your friends from 'out of town'. The kind of place that rewards bringing someone who has never been, so that you may watch their face.
Lore of the Land
A Guy Ritchie pub — our favourite privately educated, working-class hero — that happens to do a wonderful Sunday roast. The kind of establishment where everything is simultaneously exactly right and slightly unexpected, much like its owner. Rhubarb is treated like visiting royalty, which is the minimum acceptable standard.
Carlotta
When you find yourself yearning for one of your thrice-yearly trips to Capri, head to Carlotta instead. Whilst it is obnoxious in every sense of the word, Rhubarb and I like to spend a few hours sipping Lo Sgroppinos whilst sharing the Carpaccio di Manzo, pretending we're at Villa Verde. Leave the Pucci at home, though.
Belgravia & Knightsbridge
4 recommendationsWhere stucco meets restraint and a shit ton of money.
Pantechnicon
This place mixes the Nordic with the Japanese across several floors in the middle of Belgravia. After buying stag horn salt and pepper grinders from Fiona Finds for the chalet in Megève, dart across to Pantechnicon for beef carpaccio. Rhubarb appreciates its quiet confidence, which is something they share.
The Aubrey
Nestled in The Mandarin Oriental, The Aubrey makes for a great people-watching game of 'daughter or dating?'. It also offers a superb Japanese Izakaya experience, including a separate menu for dogs. The head chef asked for a photo of Rhubarb with her food. We are still unsure as to whether he was a fan or simply very proud of his work.
OKA
We usually avoid anything with 'pan Asian' in the title since a particularly bad blind double date at Nobu (Berkeley Square branch, ugh) in 2008. However, we make an exception for OKA. The sushi portions are generous, the food is very reasonably priced, and we love the crunchy spicy tuna roll with a glass of lychee juice.
Canton Blue, The Peninsula
Dog's deserve upscale Cantonese cooking too.
Maida Vale
1 recommendationSlightly less unhinged than its neighbour to the south, but only slightly. Canals. Good food. Did we mention the canal?
The Hero
The same team behind The Pelican, so expect a similar experience — although a little less unhinged, for those days when you'd like to remember the journey home. Reliable, warm, and the sort of pub you'd be quietly devastated to discover wasn't on your street.
St James's & Beyond
3 recommendationsFor when you've strayed slightly from the W postcode but refuse to abandon your standards.
Maison François
After stealing all of the decent staff from Soho House (at Rhubarb's recommendation), Maison François has become a firm favourite. Order the moules marinière flatbread and wash it down with a grape margarita. You must also choose something sweet from the pastry trolley and follow that with an extra dirty martini. Don't forget to pack your cashmere dog blanket, as unmanicured paws are prohibited on the banquettes. Tell Darren we sent you.
Bouchon Racine
With a waitlist to rival that of The Hurlingham Club, Bouchon offers the finest classic French bistro cuisine. Prepare yourself and your pup to eat everything from brains to snails. If this sounds alarming, you are not yet ready for Bouchon Racine. Come back when you are.
Love My Human Townhouse
One of the finest dog-friendly establishments in London, feeding, grooming, and reiki-ing (yes, that is an option) only the most elite pups in the city. The café has a separate dog menu with calories included and a rather good human menu too. Rhubarb has booked her next six appointments. We are not in a position to countermand this.
To Stay
5 recommendationsFor visiting from out of town — or for those tax and legal situations that require a temporary change of address.
Nobu Hotel, Portman Square
Should you be visiting from 'out of town' (for tax or legal reasons) and you are looking for a dog-friendly stay where your canine companion is given their very own bathrobe to saunter around in, look no further. The hotel also includes a reformer pilates studio and a host of ayurvedic treatments to energise you after a stressful day of evading the authorities. Rhubarb wore the bathrobe for three days.
The Savoy
Whilst it may be more dated than your godfather's views on immigration — yes, Albert, being an ex-pat in Mallorca is exactly the same thing, and no, we are not discussing this again — their level of service is unparalleled and the butlers are fantastic with the dogs. The room service food is rather expensive, so best to BYOF.
Claridge's, Mayfair
An all-rounder when it comes to style and service. The new rooms are particularly beautiful, with plenty of space for your dog to roam. You can also order pretty much anything from the room service menu for your dog — however, be prepared to pay the price. A simple organic broth with steamed chicken and carrots cost Rhubarb £80. She had no complaints.
Hotel Café Royal
Beautiful, clean, and modern with a killer spa. The suite came with a 24-hour butler and a driver — however, unlike The Savoy, the butler won't check in on your dog or take it for a walk. There is a rule that your dog cannot be left unattended in the room, which I found quite odd. Rhubarb was allowed for breakfast, which helped. The food here is great.
Browns Hotel, Mayfair
One of the oldest hotels in London, with notable guests including Rudyard Kipling, Oscar Wilde, and more royals than those enclosures at Ascot — your dog will certainly be in good company. With welcome packages from William Morris & Co and a dog-friendly guide to the local area laid out lovingly on the plush dog bed, Browns is the pinnacle of elegance and attention to detail. Their adjoining restaurant Charlie's is also dog-friendly. You must try the Charlie's Caesar with chicken thigh.
